Thursday, April 10, 2014

PEOPLE CHANGE



                I see people getting better; I see people getting worse.  Indeed, people change either for better or for worse. 
                I work in rehab facility where in I get to see patients who are addicted into shabu, marijuana, sex, relationships and are into problematic relationships with their wife and family.  The first time I saw them, I see in their eyes that they seems to be no hope at all.  I mean, there’s nothing that they can do better from what they have been through as an addict.  But after several months, or for some it takes them years to be in the program, they change.  They go out in the center as person different from the first time I saw them.  No more red eyes, untidy hair, dirty clothes and indescribable sadness.  I see them as happy, fulfilled, satisfied, and excited to be in the new chapter of their lives.  Indeed, people change.
                On the contrary, I see people as a very good, talented, successful and powerful.  I don’t know how to describe but I guess, someone I look up to.  But then again, people change.  Years after I met them, I see them different now.  They appeared disturbed, confused, sad, and unsatisfied.  I don’t know what happened to them along the way, but as what I’ve said, people change. 
                This realization makes me think, which side I am in? Am I getting better? or Am I getting worse. People Change. 

Sunday, February 9, 2014

Grateful

Here we go again, another week passed, and I am just thankful to GOD for keeping me alive everyday.  Not just alive, but with good people around. My friends, teachers, family, and students who kept me going this week.  I don't know how exactly I feel now, but I think, my feeling is mixed.  Or I should rather say, generally sad.  Yes, really really sad of what is going on in my life.  The question that I have for my self is that, "Did I do something wrong? or I was just true to what I know (as far as I know) is right?."

I don't know, and until now, I am lost.  Honestly, I don't know where to go and what to do in my life.  Yes, there is something I have to do, but where? I wish GOD can answer me literally now, in as much as I want.  But I believe He is teaching me to be patient and faithful to Him.

Today, I did something good I think.  I shared Counselling session with my students and it was very fulfilling to really be of help to others.  I guess my prayer for tonight is to be continually use by GOD in any way I can.  Thank you Lord for today.  I choose to be grateful, and I am really grateful!

Tuesday, January 7, 2014

Ambivalence

Today I found myself reading my previous blogs.  I don't know what I feel but I think , writing will help me identify what I feel.  Soon.