CONFUSION

         Most of the times I find myself so confused on what to do in my life.  Specifically in work.  Lately, I was told that they want me to be full-time employed in the current work that I do, psychometrist in a private drug rehabilitation center.  It’s not that I do not like the work there, it’s just that I have that confusion, doubt, fear that sometimes I could not understand where is it coming from.  I am confused because, I do not know if this is what God wants me to do, I mean, is this workplace the one that God wants me to minister? That question seems so unanswerable and I could not even make-up my find to answer it. 

         Secondly, I doubt because the work place is run by a non-adventist people.  And, I grew up from an Adventist community where people I deal every day, talk with, grew up with are Adventist.  Yes, I know, not all people in Adventist Community are good or that “righteous” but I just could not understand why that feeling of doubt is so strong.  The feeling that this is not a good workplace since this is run by a non-adventist people.

        Lastly is fear.  I fear that I would not be able to stand firm on my faith and that in the end, I might end-up compromising my faith.  I fear that I will not be a light to the people I will meet.  I fear that I will end-up not having that passion for service. 

        That being said, I am really confused.  It’s more on arguing my values and principles in life.   Because I have that strong conviction that I am to work only in an Adventist Denomination.  My parents worked in Adventist Denomination and it seems to me that I have that straight thinking to work only in Adventist Denomination.  I believe, I have high chance to be employed to the two workplace.  But, what I am praying for is to answer my question, where GOD wants me to work? If He will see me work, where? What am I doing? And to whom I am working with?  Questions, questions, questions…..

        Thus, as of this time, I just let things happen, I mean, letting and go and letting GOD!  And I pray that GOD will enlighten me before the day comes.